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Press release / Parenting advice with school holidays in mind

Press release issued for Beating Anger Bath

A south-west anger specialist has highlighted the need for adults to understand the impact their reactions have on the behaviour of children.

Mark Urry of Beating Anger Bath has received a number of calls in the last month from parents worried they will pass on their anger.

These concerns, alongside national news over teaching discipline in the classroom, have prompted him to offer thoughts and reminders for parents.   These are designed to help throughout the summer holidays and beyond.

The government has stated that all schools should scrap their existing ‘no touch’ policies from September.  This move follows reports of violent behaviour in schools doubling within a year.

Mark Urry, who runs courses and provides personal anger counselling across the south-west, stresses that the way in which teachers and parents handle anger is often linked directly to children’s bad behaviour.

“The focus is often aimed in the wrong direction” he explained.

“We can’t teach children not to be angry but we can teach them how to express themselves in a healthy, constructive way.”

He added that it is important that parents consider how they express themselves, particularly in situations driven by emotion.

“The recent press articles on the behaviour of children in schools will no doubt have prompted parents to consider their own approach.

“Those who demonstrate an authoritative, guiding manner towards their children will promote a healthy and constructive relationship which will increase self esteem, confidence and communication between all family members” he said.

In Mark’s experience, holidays can often fuel increased stress levels at home.   Although stress does not cause anger, it has a fuelling effect to the triggers, by shortening our fuse.

To help people reduce stress and improve communication with their children, Mark has compiled the following tips and advice:

  • Avoid disciplining in anger, wait until you are both calm
  • Have clear rules, rewards and sanctions
  • Always challenge the behaviour, not the child
  • Understand first, rather than being understood first
  • Don’t take anything personally, ever
  • Avoid mixed messages – walk your talk
  • Maintain your resourcefulness by ensuring you have time out
  • Aim for a win/win situation
  • Respond to a situation, rather than react – be alert to your automatic response
  • Remind yourself of your childhood – you were one once!
  • Don’t shame and blame
  • Keep communicating

Mark underwent extensive training and qualified with the British Association of Anger Management.  He stresses that it is a natural and healthy feeling, which can be controlled.  His services aim to help individuals to understand their emotions better, and to improve the quality of their working and personal lives.

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